Let’s Just Be Real

In an effort to be honest, real, and up front about my cough *issues*, I should share that last week I decided it was a good time to start decreasing my meds.

Yeah.

Am I all for meds if you need them?  Absolutely! (This is a term Lubbockites seem to use on a regular basis)  Am I a fan of being on them forever?  Not really.  I mean, if you don’t have to be.  The research I have read basically says that no one knows the long-term affects these medications have, because most of them haven’t been around that long. So I would really like to not lose my sight in 20 years because I chose to continue to take meds that I could have at least tried to get off of. 

That being said, how will I know if I still need them unless I try to wean off of them?  This line of thinking has been the demise of several friends throughout the years, and yet I tried…

I mean, we must remember, I feel well because I take medication.  It’s such a trick of the mind to suddenly think “Hey, I’m feeling pretty good.  Maybe I don’t need this stuff (that is causing me to feel pretty good..).”  Lame.

The hard heartbeat came back on day two.  The wanting to crawl in bed and avoid the world came around day 5, and then day 6 I upped the dosage again.  Which, of course, made me very sick because you aren’t supposed to play with medications unless ordered by your doctor (yes, Stacy (my doctor friend…), I know).

So, I’m back where I started.  My poor husband, I didn’t tell him I changed my meds until it had been about a week and I was starting to act a little crazy.  He was not happy with me. 

I will probably try again one day, but for now I’m going to continue happily swallowing those two little white gems every morning, and be thankful I live in a day and age where those gems exist and I don’t have to live in a haze of anxiety and depression.  I have family who did that years ago, apparently it wasn’t pretty.

And again, I am realizing that almost every person I get to know well enough to share this with eventually shares with me their own journey with anxiety/depression/medication.   Why do we try so hard to hide this from others?  What kind of community are we creating when we hide those very important parts of ourselves?  Not a genuine one, that’s for sure. 

I will not be a shiny, plastic Jesus to my community.  I will strive to be a broken, beautiful, hurting, stumbling, trying follower who (prayerfully) attracts others to meet my reason behind it all. 

Do you need to take off your shiny, plastic mask and let your community see genuineness? 

6 thoughts on “Let’s Just Be Real”

  • I hope you don't condemn yourself because you take these meds–or listen to others if they condemn you. My mom has needed them for over 30 years. While I was growing up I watched her over and over again try to get herself off of them. It.was.disaster.every.time. I don't know …she felt weak for taking them, lacking in faith for taking them, less of a Christian for needing them …whatever it was, she has finally come to the realization that her body does not produce the chemicals that it needs to fully function and she has made the decision to never try weaning herself off again. I hate that things brain and chemical related are still so covered in stigma. We don't feel badly for taking blood pressure meds. Or heart pills. Or estrogen. Why do we place such condemnation on ourselves when other areas of our body don't function as they should? It's a medical condition. Just because we don't understand it as easily as, say, a heart condition, doesn't mean it's less of a medical condition. Please don't be so hard on yourself! 🙂

  • I am not a fan of masks. I try to bear my soul to the world. I think it's crucial for Christians to be authentic! The walk of faith is not always a petal-lined path – it's actually pretty thorny out there. So, YAY for you for being real! It's refreshing, and we need more honesty as we all struggle together to live out our faith.

    GOD BLESS, Amy.

  • I was able to successfully wean myself off of my medications, but it took years. Like you, I'm a little afraid of what some of the long term side effects could be.

    Before I reduced my dosages I did make sure to tell my husband, mostly because I spent a good two weeks acting pretty crazy.

    I reduced one medicine at a time in very small increments, breaking a pill in quarters sometimes, so I could still take 3/4 of a dose. I started decreasing my meds in 2010 and just finished with all (2) of them this year. Each time I decreased, no matter how small of a decrease it was, I would have about two weeks of feeling really bad/off. I'm guessing this was because my body/mind was adjusting to not having the chemicals I'd become dependent on.

    I realize my method, or getting off of meds in general, isn't for everyone, but this worked for me. I definitely needed the support (and patience) of my husband though!

  • I think doing it that patiently is the way to go, I was trying to half mine for a week or so, then reduce. I realize now it was too fast. I will probably try again, and this time I'll go with your method! I would LOVE to not be dependent on these forever!

  • Bạn cần sử dụng dịch vụ giao hàng. Liệu có có công ty nào có thể đáp ứng được nhu cầu chuyển hàng về miền tây số lượng lớn mà vẫn đảm bảo chất lượng. Hãy đến với chúng tôi. Hiện chúng tôi đang cung cấp nhiều dịch vụ liên quan đến vận chuyển như giao hàng nhanh, gửi hàng từ tphcm đi hà nội, ký gửi hàng hóa, cho thuê kho bãi, vận chuyển hàng đi cần thơ, dịch vụ bốc xếp hàng hóa, chuyển phát nhanh, gửi hàng từ hà nội vào sài gòn. Hãy sử dụng dịch vụ của chúng tôi khi bạn cần nhé.

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